Scooch's Eurovision entry, 'Flying The Flag (For You)', arrived at Popjustice HQ this morning. We emailed it around the office and here are some things people said about it.
"For a start the title looks like a Skrewdriver title. I doubt it actually sounds like Skrewdriver though."
"It is the worst thing I have ever skipped through hoping for a good bit."
"It's like The Vengaboys never happened."
"I think I'm right in my theory that the other acts are only there to make sure Justin wins."
"I got to 48 seconds before my ears started to bleed and I had to turn it off."
"Perhaps it’s a tribute to those who were in the planes on 9/11?"
Those who are pleased to see Scooch back will say that it is JUST FUN and NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY because THAT IS WHAT POP IS ALL ABOUT. It's what pop can sometimes be about, but the problem is that this song is not fun. It is a laboured, workmanlike and not even very good attempt at pretending to be carefree. It's miserable, like the clown hired in for a children's party who finishes his gig and goes home to his bedsit for a wank and a bottle of vodka.
'Flying The Flag (For You)' is pop music of a variety which, during the Steps and S Club era, came to define for many what 'pop' was supposed to be. But it's not what pop music should necessarily be like now, because things change a lot in six years. And if you do want pop music to sound like this — cheap, bright and supposedly cheerful — don't you at least have the right to expect a decent tune?