You get two or three of these a year and here's the first of 2007…
It's by Groove Armada (!?!).
It's also by MUTYA FUCKING BUENA.
It's called — fanfare — 'Song For Mutya'!!!
It sounds like Richard X AND Xenomania AND Goldfrapp on the same song.
It sounds VERY 1980s.
It sounds VERY 2010s.
It sounds like a Number One.
If you were to place Mutya's George Michael duet at Land's End and this track at John O'Groats they still would not be far enough apart to denote just how amazing this song is compared with how terrible the George Michael one was.
It's got some "hey!" bits.
It is a bit like a really stompy electro version of what the Sugababes' 'Easy' was probably supposed to be.
Its lyrical concerns are driving fast, listening to Prince, sitting at some traffic lights and seeing your boyfriend pull up next to you with another, rubbish girl in his passenger seat. We are not sure about the environmental ethics of two-car households but they make for AMAZING pop records.
Its chorus is all "it's a sure fire way to ruin my day, blahblahblah".
Its final moments are very New Ordery.
It does, admittedly, have a fade at the end, but it's a fade with ZAPPING NOISES over it.
You are going to LOVE it.