Carly 'Carlos' Rae Jeppo McJepsen, the woman who singlehandedly banished misery from the lives of this planet's 7.4bn inhabitants last year, has not received a NOMI•NA•TION for a Brit award.
Her name does not appear on the International Female shortlist — which does include Meghan Trainor. Even if you re-read the shortlist several times then go for a little walk and come back to it with fresh eyes her name does still not appear. Her name is totally absent.
CARLY RAE JEPSEN HAS NOT BEEN NOMINATED FOR INTERNATIONAL FEMALE.
The full list of categories in which Jeppo has been overlooked, some of them due to ineligibility but that's not the point, is:
- British Male
- British Female
- British Group
- British Breakthrough
- British Single
- British Video
- International Male
- International Female
- International Group
- Album Of The Year
Years & Years were nominated for a few but let's not allow that to shift attention away from the fact that a pop crime has occurred and justice must be sought.
The full list of nominees is below. Read it and weep.
British male solo artist
Aphex Twin
Calvin Harris
James Bay
Jamie xx
Mark Ronson
British female solo artist
Adele
Amy Winehouse
Florence + the Machine
Jess Glynne
Laura Marling
British group
Blur
Coldplay
Foals
One Directions
Years & Years
British breakthrough act
Catfish and the Bottlemen
James Bay
Jess Glynne
Wolf Alice
Years & Years
British album of the year
Adele – 25
Coldplay – A Head Full of Dreams
Florence + the Machine – How Big How Blue How Beautiful
James Bay – Chaos and the Calm
Jamie xx – In Colour
British producer of the year
Charlie Andrew
Mark Ronson
Mike Crossey
Tom Dalgety
British single
Adele – Hello
Calvin Harris and Disciples – How Deep Is Your Love
Ed Sheeran and Rudimental – Bloodstream
Ellie Goulding – Love Me Like You Do
James Bay – Hold Back the River
Jess Glynne – Hold My Hand
Little Mix – Bad Magic << WE COPIED AND PASTED THIS OFF THE GUARDIAN WEBSITE, APOLS
Olly Murs ft Demi Lovato – Up
Philip George – Wish You Were Mine
Years & Years – King
British artist video of the year
Adele – Hello
Calvin Harris and Disciples – How Deep Is Your Love
Ed Sheeran – Photograph
Jessie J – Flashlight
Little Mix – Black Magic << SECOND TIME LUCKY
Naughty Boy ft Beyoncé and Arrow Benjamin – Runnin’ (Lose it All)
One Direction – Drag Me Down
Sam Smith – Writing’s on the Wall
Years & Years – King
International male solo artist
Drake
Father John Misty
Justin Bieber
Kendrick Lamar
The Weeknd
International female solo artist
Ariana Grande
Björk
Courtney Barnett
Lana del Rey
Meghan Trainor
International group
Alabama Shakes
Eagles of Death Metal
Major Lazer
Tame Impala
U2
Absolute shambles. A sad day for music ladies and gentlemen. A sad day indeed.
HERE'S SOME JEPPO TO CHEER THINGS UP.